Love is friendship that has caught fire. - Ann Landers

Think of every love story we've ever read or watched. Boy meets girl (rarely boy meets boy or girl meets girl too). Boy chases girl who doesn't show the remotest interest. Boy stalks girl till he wears her down.
Or, single person feels like life sucks because they don't have someone. Enter, asshole who actually has a heart of gold in the end. In real life though, such a person would have a million red flags.
Somewhere down the line, we've all internalized this message: Love is about thrill, it's hard work, it's supposed to be really messy, there'll be fighting and yelling and conflict, but then you'll have your happy ending.

But what is a 'happy ending'? 'They lived happily ever after' is one of the most unrealistic lines we've learnt. There is no happily ever after. There is companionship and alignment of values and comfort - that stay long after the 'honeymoon stage'.

Here's the truth. Those constant butterflies in your stomach sometimes aren't butterflies - it's anxiety.
We have grown so accustomed to the myth of 'The One' that we tend to idealize people even when they show us they're not as nice as we think. We have been conditioned to think that our lives are empty without love, especially us women. So much that any sign of love from someone is taken, even if it's not good for us.

The more things change, the more they stay the same

Modern dating may be slightly different from decades ago, but despite the new-age terms like ghosting and bread-crumbing, it's really the same thing. In our parents' generations, they learnt to 'adjust'. In our generation, we think we're above that but in reality, we're still 'adjusting'.
At least he calls. At least she doesn't cheat. At least...
By lowering the bar further and further, we're actually doing more harm than good. We're taught to 'settle' or we won't find better. In the process, we lose touch with our authentic selves, desperate to 'make it work'.

Love begins with you.

In a world that tells us we are incomplete without a significant other - try this. Examine yourself - not through the lens of other people, but your own. Think of everything that makes you, you. Most importantly, figure out what makes you tick, what your deal-breakers are and what your boundaries are. Spend time alone. Let go of the stigma that says you shouldn't be 'alone'.

Take yourself out on a date. Go to the movies. Go bookstore browsing. Sit by yourself in a coffee shop and just take in the sights and sounds. I've done it, despite the curious looks to which I just respond with a smile. It's really not bad at all :)
As I gradually got to know myself during a time of isolation during the pandemic, I started learning to love myself, flaws and all. What happened was that gradually, I started only connecting with quality people. My intuition became a lot harder to ignore. My circle became smaller, but filled with better people who inspired me. And, I began to attract people who were also wonderful, incrementally.
So don't go searching for love or wondering when your time will come. It's right there within you :) and soon you'll know when the right time is. You won't 'need' a partner anymore. You'll be content with or without one. You'll want someone because they're special, and because they enhance you, not complete you. Because you're already whole and complete :)